Consecutive Days Riding: 15 Consecutive Days Blogging: 16
Today’s Mileage: 10 Total Trip Mileage: 147
As I climb on the bike this morning and begin the wheel spinning I realize that while I met a milestone yesterday with two weeks of riding, today I find myself dealing with a dizzying swirl of doubts and concerns. As so often happens, doubts gang up on you and come at you from every direction and source. They often attack multiple levels of your beliefs and goals. What are these doubts?
On the Material Equipment level: No my bike did not break down! However, yesterday first my laptop and then my desk top crashed. When you are on a virtual journey this cuts your lifeline and leave you hoping for a Geek Squad roadside assistance truck. I was able to get the desktop back on line for now, however, the laptop contained most of my blogging materials. I have set out a couple of flares and assistance is on the way! I’ve been here before and simple remind myself that just when you think technology and computers are your friends: they will turn on you!
On the Physical Body level: No I haven’t blown a tire/muscle! In fact, my body has grown accustomed to the exercise. I look forward to the tight tired muscle feeling that comes after the ride. These doubts have to do with the fact that no matter how hard we try our body still wears out and breaks down. Yesterday morning I sat in a doctor’s office with my partner as she waited to meet with the physician who would be performing her surgery. The surgery is not life threatening, but might be disfiguring. This presented me with a vivid reminder that there is precious little we can do to help people in this situation! I undertook the stationary rider aspect of this journey to help extend the warranty on my vehicle (bring down the high blood pressure). I will be here for her with a firm embrace and a compassionate ear, that’s all I can do!
On the Motivational level: No I’m not questioning the purpose and goal of this journey! I am still creating a process for finding and choosing Pilgrimage Sites. I am still working on finding a balance between the Personal and Spiritual aspects of the journey. They may be more of the same thing rather then different paths. Both questions create a level of tension.
To capture a feeling, and image, a precept,
and then transform it
is the artist’s greatest joy!
To capture a feeling, an image, a precept,
with its essence unchanged
is the artist’s greatest challenge!
People often ask why I no longer have a therapy practice and instead teach full time. This is a valid question as many of my fellow graduate students who started off in academia were drawn away to fulltime clinical work both for the money and the satisfactions of one-on-one therapy. Teaching brings me a great deal of satisfaction, but it can leave me wondering at times if I’ve had a lasting impact on my students’ lives and ultimately upon their success and happiness.
I teach because I envision myself planting seeds that will sprout and bear fruit in the students’ lives long after they have left the University. Part of the reason I have taken to the Blogosphere is out of the hope that the seeds I am sowing will fall on fertile ground and reach a great number of people.
A special thanks to the photographers associated with Panramio for the beautiful scene from along the roadside. Today’s images also from the the stationarypilgrim early drawings.